Bound Kitten is Bound!
As of about 2 days ago, I have been granted something I’ve wanted for months.
Sir has handcuffed me to bed. From now on, I sleep in bondage.
He told me, in a very stern tone, that I was to go straight to bed, but I was so excited about the new growth that I wanted to blog about it while it was still fresh.
For that, I was pinched, multiple times, really hard as punishment, for opening my laptop is not considered sleep.
But He was gracious and understanding enough to give me ten minutes so that I can continue to be introspective.
How do I feel? I feel that this is the best thing that has happened to O/our D/s since W/we dove into it a year ago. I feel that W/we’re finally finding a bass groove that W/we can sit inside of. W/we’re both coming into O/our roles and finally finding a way to incorporate those roles into O/our everyday lives.
I also feel that Sir can now dive into His beautiful creative mind and become better with His rope ties. He can really put me in my place now that He is now using this power. It has always been there. I’m just glad He has finally chosen to start binding me for sleepytimes. =]
Happy kitten is happy, though would prefer some chamomile tea before bed. Must not press my luck. Besides, making tea might be a bit cumbersome with handcuffs on. hehehe
If Y/you would like, feel free to leave ideas in the comments for Sir. I have a slight shoulder issue, so hogties for 8 hours might be a bit much. I just can’t box my shoulders for too long. Though sleeping with my right wrist tied to my right ankle, and my left wrist tied to my left ankle would be perfectly comfortable for me.
All ideas are welcomed!
Obedience
Today’s question: Do you find that obedience comes easy for you? And, if not, what is the biggest challenge to your obedience?
Obedience comes easy when I want to obey. When I have reason to obey. When I trust the one giving me the command. If I feel uneasy or unsure about the command, I will most likely say no. And stand by my answer. I will not do something I’m not comfortable with without complete trust in the other party.
I feel that I’m a powerful submissive. I have the power, always, to say no. I have the power to withdraw consent at any time. This does not make me disobedient or disrespectful. It means that I know myself inside and out, I know my limits, and I will not do anything that violates those limits.
So yeah.. The biggest challenge to my obedience is trust. Without my complete trust, you will not have my complete obedience.
Sometimes, it’s okay to share your secrets. =]
Not all of my assignments come from the brain of my wonderful Sir. A lot of the time, they come from submissiveguide.com.
Not only are they a wealth of knowledge and guidance for all submissives/slaves in BDSM, but their writing prompts make you really think about yourself and make you dive deep within yourself for the answer.
If you feel you need a little more help from lifestyle submissives/slaves, then go on over to the lovely girls of Submissive Guide, and they will take care of you. I promise!
Teaching Sir
Today’s prompt: Our Dominants teach us so much about ourselves. What is something you’ve taught your Dominant?
I believe that I teach Sir something new everyday. Whether it’s something new about me, or a fact, or how to do something, etc.
One thing that I believe I’ve done well (always a path of growth) is teaching Him how to communicate & carry Himself better in front of others. He has no problem with speaking His mind. It’s just getting the other person(s) in the conversation to understand Him without me translating. =]
Favorites, Least Favorites, Changing The Physical Being
Today’s prompt: What is your favorite thing about your Sir, what is the least favorite thing about Him, and if you could change one thing about Him physically, what would it be?
He just had to make this hard, didn’t He? I hate these kinds of prompts. It always makes the writer look like a fucking asshole. No matter what they do. *sighs*
My favorite thing about Sir is His excitement when it comes to cars & technology. His beautiful brown eyes light up, and I cannot help but smile. He’s amazing.
I think His insecurity irks me the most. It sparks his jealousy & His possessiveness. When that happens, it makes me sad. Nothing I say assuages the situation. Only time can pass before He thinks of something else, and then that part is over for the time being. *sighs*
Physically, if I could change anything about Him, it would have to be to make His spine completely straight, His eyesight perfect, and His knee to be a normal 21 year old knee. If I had to choose between one of those three things, it would be tough, but I think it would have to be either His eyesight or His knee. If He needs one more prescription, He will not be allowed to drive anymore. Yet, there’s something wrong with His replaced knee, and it’s hard for Him to walk sometimes without a cane.
How can I choose?
What would you choose?
The Hardest Part Of Surrendering Oneself
Today’s prompt: What part of yourself or independence is the hardest for you to surrender?
Relinquishing control has been the hardest part of my transition into a 24/7 D/s relationship. Areas that I had control over, I have no control over now. It’s really tough seeing some details get missed, because I’m a stickler for details. A perfectionist, if you will.
Now, I have to be okay with it all. It’s something I’m still working on. I might not have the best perspective, but I’m getting there. Maybe I need to think about it a different way. I’ll look into that.
I come from a family of control freaks. Submitting that control is really hard for me. Probably one of the hardest things I’ve ever done in my life.
I’m just glad that it’s also becoming very fulfilling.
Is There A Difference Between Humiliation & Degradation?
Today’s prompt: Have you been humiliated? Have you been degraded? Is there a difference in how you view the two words, and how you respond to the different scenarios?
Humiliate (v) – to cause (a person) a painful loss of pride, self-respect, or dignity; mortify.
Degrade (v) – to lower in dignity or estimation; bring into contempt
Humiliated can connote just being really embarrassed, whereas degradation has a much more negative connotation.
For example, a Dominant can humiliate a submissive by having her do something mortifying (ie. Peeing outside of a toilet when she’s not into watersports, kissing a stranger, etc). That same Dominant can degrade the same submissive by calling her names as she does these acts.
For me, I can be humiliated, and be okay, as I can take embarrassment. But, if you call me hurtful names as I’m being humiliated, it can lower my sense of self worth.
So, to answer the question, yes, I’ve been humiliated, and yes I’ve been degraded. Both have been outside of BDSM. And yes, I do view the two terms a little differently. They are definitely synonyms with different connotations.
What Should A Dominant Give A Submissive In Exchange For Their Submission?
I’ve been asked to answer this question with my opinion.
For me, as a submissive, I crave structure, safety & discipline. Without structure, and resounding discipline, I can sometimes lead myself astray. So for me, personally, that’s what I need from a Dominant.
Different submissives need different things, and will ask different things of different Dominants. I do not believe that there is a cookie cutter way of looking at BDSM.
So what should a Dominant give a submissive in exchange for submission? Whatever the submissive wants and needs. And vice versa, really. Everytime you meet someone, you begin a relationship. Whether that relationship is labeled as a friendship, acquaintance, coworker, or something else, it is still a relationship. I believe that every relationship has wants & needs. Friends will call on you to help them out. They need you. I don’t believe that BDSM is any different.
Every Dominant has wants and needs that they would like to fulfill. In a submissive’s service to their Dominant, unless those wants & needs are on a Hard Limit list of theirs, they should help to fulfill them.
Give and take. When you give something to someone, that person takes it from you. When you help to fulfill a sub’s wants & needs, that submissive will most likely want to help fulfill yours as well.
For a healthy relationship to grow, both parties need to give something in exchange for what they give to one another. That’s just how it goes.
Assignments
As part of my service to my wonderful Sir, I will be answering writing prompts that He gives me. It will be my take on His question.
Stay tuned for the first one!
So here’s my obligatory introduction post. =p
My name, as my Sir calls me, and as you will know me is Kitten. I’m 22, moved to California November, 2008, and have dove headfirst into BDSM. I’m becoming more comfortable with pain than I ever have, and I love being tied up & suspended.
True bliss.
If you wish, please join me while I give you some insight into the mind of a young submissive who found out early in life what she wants, needs, and craves.
As I believe in no censorship, say what you will in a comment. Don’t hold back either. My skin is thicker than it seems, and I will never respond in a catty manner. Always with respect & dignity.
Much love to all!
Kitten
